How time flies – it’s Kindling time 🕖

On Friday I sent out another essay about why I used to tell everyone I loved them all the time. If you would like to read that, you can click here.

I’m becoming less and less unemployed as time goes on. I’ve started a part time gig and have been acting and painting houses and, of course, writing.

I had a pitch accepted last week so watch this space for a link to an article by yours truly.

Get a cuppa and enjoy this one for me x

I don’t know what I’m doing
I know it looks like I do — but I don’t

I’ve never done this before
the doubt crawls in and nests
most days

I’m not doing enough
— I’m not hungry for it
tear-it-off-the-bone hungry
lick-the-plate-and-demand-more hungry

I say the wrong thing
get defensive when I’m told as much
get smaller because I know it’s true

how will i survive this
audacious grab
at a life that doesn’t exist yet

yet.

And what do you think about it?

I suppose I haven’t really.

Thought about it? That one’s a giraffe.

Mm.

Why not?

I just haven’t. I suppose I didn’t really think it concerned me. Do you see the car?

I think it concerns all of us in a way. Wouldn’t you want someone to care if you were affected?

Of course I would, but I think that’s putting my needs in the centre of someone else’s life.

On their backs, they watched the clouds bloom and puff.

If it affected me, would you care?

I care about you.

So, yes?

Yes, I would care then.

And what would you think about it if it affected me?

I suppose I would have to think about it.

He turned to look at him. In profile his nose made a straight line from its tip to the top of his forehead. He resisted the urge to drag his finger along it.

I’m not very patient, you know? How long do you need to think about it? A minute?

I might say the wrong thing.

Okay.

You might get upset with me.

What would you say?

I don’t know I’m just conscious that you already know your thoughts on the matter and I’m at a disadvantage.

But you’ve had all week to think about it.

A cloud the shape of a lion’s face passed overhead and neither commented, though both saw it.

I didn’t think I would have to give my opinion on the matter.

Do you think I’m being too much of a social justice warrior?

No, I think you’re just curious to know what I think about it. Let me think for a second.

He nodded and pulled at the grass by his hips.

A minute passed and he turned his head once more to observe the perfect straight line of his nose. The smaller curves of his unassuming mouth.

Is my time up?

I think so.

Okay, I have something.

Go ahead.

Oh, I get to go first, too? This does feel like a trap.

I can go if you still don’t know what you want to say.

No, it’s okay, I’ll go.

Take it away.

I suppose, what I think is: what happened to Felicity Highbridge was unfortunate. She didn’t deserve to have her computer hacked nor to have someone poking around her private files. The fact that they then found incriminating photos and drafted manifestos makes my empathy diminish slightly if not, in my less flattering moments, entirely.
That they then chose to post everything on Reddit instead of informing the authorities or the police, I both admire and hate. A small part of me wonders what I would’ve done if I were the hacker in that situation, but I guess we’ll never know because I would never hack into someone’s personal files even if I had the skills.
That’s not to say that if I were to hop on your computer to quickly send an urgent email for whatever reason and I stumbled across that same content, I wouldn’t have a huge internal debate over what to do. I might email myself copies of the files and take a week or so to mull it over. I think I’d ultimately put it all on a USB and send it to the fraud office. Inaction is still a choice. It’s still an action one way or the other – some might even argue it’s one step away from endorsement.
But in regards to what I actually think about what was found on Felicity’s computer, it’s a bit of a cop out, but I’m Switzerland on the matter. She falsified that information so that more would be done. She says those photos were a one off to bribe another minister to look the other way – preferably in the direction of her strangely posed nudes. Again, I don’t want to judge as people can send whatever they like, and I think it’s gross that they were included in the leak at all.
If scientists are anything to go by, which personally I think they are, we should be scared slightly shitless about the state of the Earth’s climate and the rate at which the core temperature is rising. However, people don’t trust politicians on a good day and Felicity’s gone and proved, for better or worse, that they definitely shouldn’t.
It was a bold move and it failed. I understand the extreme measure but, if I were in her shoes, I don’t think I would’ve done it that way.

New shapes formed and he ran out of grass to pull. He shifted slightly.

Yeah, I can see that.

Yeah. So, what do you think about it all?

Oh, yeah, probably same. I think it sucked on all counts.

Rolling back the climate measures and firing her?

Yeah, and the memes are really mean.

Yeah they are.

They hadn’t noticed the damp of the ground seep into their clothes. If their phones had listened to a word they said, they might see a climate change petition come up on their phones that evening. Neither of them will sign it, but they’ll think about it.